Author Topic: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???  (Read 22215 times)

Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #50 on: September 16, 2012, 09:50:17 AM »
I'm sorry to hear that Penfold. My wife used to be a nurse (on an old-people/geriatric ward) and bed-sores were the bane of the ward. Fortunately, once they are found and action is taken, they can be quickly dealt with. It may take a while but I am sure it will be sorted out.

It is always sad to leave a loved one in care but you have to think that it is the best place for her to receive the treatment she needs. It will also give you a little time to get some rest and tackle those little jobs you've been putting off. It will also be a change of scenery/people for your wife and a change is as good as a rest :).
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Offline Penfold

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #51 on: September 17, 2012, 08:19:21 PM »
Thanks Inso,
My life at the moment is work then visit wife for about 4.5 hours then home then dinner,witch takes me to about 20.00 then relax. Little jobs plus me time have to wait until weekends  :lol: .
It is amazing without the wife  :whip: me i get lazy realy quickly
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Offline beefcake

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #52 on: September 17, 2012, 09:01:11 PM »
Really sad news there Penfold.

My house would be a tip without my wife to  :whip: me along as well.

Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #53 on: September 17, 2012, 09:13:28 PM »
Thanks Inso,
My life at the moment is work then visit wife for about 4.5 hours then home then dinner,witch takes me to about 20.00 then relax. Little jobs plus me time have to wait until weekends  :lol: .
It is amazing without the wife  :whip: me i get lazy realy quickly

You say lazy but you are just recuperating really ;)
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Offline Gothy Beans

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #54 on: October 02, 2012, 10:19:47 PM »
I'm going to add to my list and say giving away a tiny kitten that I looked after for over a month.
I still desperately miss her, but I can't have four cats in a one-bed maisonette.
I'm not respectable, and never sensible - I've been incredible, so damned irascible..
..and I like the things I do, so hooray for me.

Offline ink the troll

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #55 on: January 14, 2013, 12:06:55 PM »
You know, I thought having to tell my mom that her mom died would be a fairly hard thing to do. But in August I found out that it really wasn't that bad (I guess it's easier when you've been expecting someone's death for a while).
Much harder was going thru the full reanimation package that comes with checking pulse/ heartbeat, checking eyes, checking if crazy old lady's chocking on tongue, pulling cpr valve of Anti decubitus mattresses, lifting her out of bed and putting her on the floor after calling an ambulance and then just keep going on with the cpr despite the crunchy sounds of the ribs (despite knowing damn well my grandma's dead).
Apparently that's something that's even hard to do for paramedics- they later told me that no matter how often you've done that already, there's always that split second where you cringe when you hear that sound and don't want to go on with the whole cpr procedure (actually breaking people's ribs during reanimation also isn't uncommon).
At least by now I've stopped waking up in the middle of the night thinking I'll have to go over to her place and feed her (it's funny what years of taking care of an dementia patient will do to you).

Visiting my mom in ICU after they removed one of her brain tumors was much harder, as I didn't know whether she would still be able to speak/ move. Pretty much the same goes for visiting my mom in ICU after they removed an adrenal gland + tumor as there was the danger of damaging the spinal canal/ cord due to how the tumor was located/ had to be removed.
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Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #56 on: January 14, 2013, 07:20:29 PM »
Tough stuff indeed, ink :(.

There comes a time where you wonder what other rubbish life is going to throw at you or your loved ones.
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Offline Revtrev

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #57 on: May 07, 2013, 09:51:52 PM »
Most of the social issues surrounding marriage equality and gay adoption come from organised religions. Quite a few see it as a threat to the church etc

I fear there is some truth in that, but I'm a Vicar and am actively involved in the campaign for equal marriage.  We are not all homophobes & nutters.  (OK, I'm not a homophobe anyway...)

As for the hardest thing I've ever done?  Taking a child's funeral... and/or: Having both parents diagnosed as terminally ill in the same month...
On Twitter I'm @TrevorDonnelly - say hello!

Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #58 on: May 07, 2013, 10:27:00 PM »
There is very little worse than a child's funeral... it isn't just the tiny coffin that rips your guts out, it's the parents grief as well... and the grief around the room.

The one I went to was my good friend's son who hadn't reached two before he was claimed... and that was less than two weeks after my own son was born. I felt so guilty that I wasn't going to attend but I talked to my friend and he wanted me there. To this day, I know it was the right choice to go but it still makes me tearful to remember the event.

I can fully understand how difficult it must be to get something like a child's funeral arrangements 'just right' and it isn't a job I'd ever choose to do.
The light at the end of the tunnel is just someone with a torch, locking the gate.

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Offline Penfold

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #59 on: May 08, 2013, 03:24:38 PM »
Feel for you there Inso never had that hardship came close once but the little devil pulled through but the weeks of not noing were some off the hardest i have ever had to live through.
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Offline keeper40k

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #60 on: May 09, 2013, 06:28:24 AM »
Probably finding my best friend at university had died from a massive epiletic fit. We called an ambulance and I sent my wife (well, girlfriend, then) to tell my mate's girlfriend to come home now from her Saturday job, as he wasn't well.  But it fell to me to tell her that he was gone at just 21.  Then dealing with it all, whilst still studying at the same time. Telling the rest of our course, meeting his parents again, helping sort out his stuff, dealing with a heartless landlorn.

But if not that, #2 child being born 10 weeks premature. The hospital and my parents were awesome with the amount of help we needed, but for her first six weeks, so was kept in the intesive care ward before she could come home.  She had a coupleof trips to intensive care in her first 18 month with what was basically weak lungs - which was just as hard. But fortunately now, the cheeky little sod doesn't have any of that handing over her any longer :) Just me threatening to take away treat if she doesn't get her room tidied and stop bringing toys downstairs!

Offline GearHead

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #61 on: June 18, 2013, 12:58:04 AM »
I'm just thinking about the near future. After I finally graduate, I'm going to have a staggering amount of loan debt, and I'm stuck with two choices: either pay them off over a long time and pay DOUBLE the original amount, or work my arse off at 3+ jobs, get them paid off in much less time, but see almost nothing of my wife and son in the meantime. We've been discussing it, and we're both leaning towards the latter, but it's going to be very, very to be away from them. :(
« Last Edit: June 18, 2013, 12:58:51 AM by GearHead »
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Offline beefcake

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #62 on: June 18, 2013, 11:23:20 AM »
A hard decision especially with young ones as they are so lovely at this age and adoring. Teenagers though ;)

Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #63 on: June 18, 2013, 02:01:14 PM »
The former option. Money can not buy you what your wife and child can provide. If you work away the child's early life, you miss so many milestones... no amount of money can ever buy that time back.
« Last Edit: June 19, 2013, 11:42:31 AM by Inso »
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Offline Ben Brownlie

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #64 on: June 19, 2013, 10:49:15 AM »
The latter option. Money can not buy you what your wife and child can provide. If you work away the child's early life, you miss so many milestones... no amount of money can ever buy that time back.
So you mean the FORMER option (work it off over longer time but see the family)

:P

I work away from home most of every week and I hate it, but it's what pays the bills and the time i do get with the family is really special for that. Either way has it's benefits. We can't make that choice for you

Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #65 on: June 19, 2013, 11:42:12 AM »
Yes... the former option (I've amended it now).
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