Author Topic: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???  (Read 22371 times)

Offline by-tor

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Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« on: April 07, 2012, 02:17:47 PM »
Both the mrs and i are in the process of giving up the cigs with the help of e-lites electronic cigarets so we haven't got the nicotine withdrawal to cope with right now just the loss of mr smokie . We were both in the region of 40 a day smokers , and even without the nicotine withdrawal we are both close to killing each other . And this IS the hardest thing ive ever done so i just wondered what the hardest thing is you've ever done ?
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Offline Hasslefriesian

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #1 on: April 07, 2012, 03:20:48 PM »
1. Not telling my parents that my sister was dead. I'd had the call from the paramedics but spoke to them when they phoned me from their car on the way to where Jen lived and felt that I couldn't let on in case dad got distracted and had an accident.

2. Leaving my ex-wife and taking the kids.

3. Living through the period of September 2010 until just before Christmas 2011.

4. Coping with the times where Sally has been close to death but trying keep a brave and cheerful face to help her along.

5. Giving up alcohol. Easily the worst five minutes of my life.
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Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #2 on: April 07, 2012, 04:40:59 PM »
Crikey...there's a question! Where the hell do I begin?

Having my Smudge put to sleep (she was a badly treated rescue dog and we only had her for a couple of years before she contracted incurable cancer).

Checking my mum for life signs before closing her eyes and contacting the doctor...Liver cancer claimed her (she was the first dead person I ever saw).

Feeling completely useless each time my wife miscarried...you just learn to cope with everything being your fault because it is the right thing to do to help your heartbroken wife get through it.

My son getting sick. It was the worst two weeks of my life...I really believed I was going to lose him. Fortunately he is completely healthy again (so it was worth the pain).

I used to smoke. I got up one morning and decided to quit and I haven't smoked since. It took two weeks to start feeling the benefits and it was like having a veil lifted from my lungs. That was 22 years ago. It is amazing what a little bit of will-power can achieve and I didn't find it difficult at all.

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Offline Bahir

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #3 on: April 07, 2012, 06:36:19 PM »
Moving my family to another country and trying to learn the language.  I am not a language learner and my job depends heavily on my language skills. How do you open a bank account, start up a house hold, jump through the government residency requirements when you speak the language like Tarzan?

We (my wife and I) went to university to learn the language.  The first day of class they asked everyone to share their name, country of origin and age.  After I shared one of the other students looked at me and said, "You are older than my dad!" I was older than all their dads... I was older than my teachers.  At one point I was the oldest dude in the school.  They say the best time to learn a language is before the age of 12.  I was quite a bit older than 12.

You know the old saying.  If you speak three languages your trilingual, if you speak two languages your bilingual and if you speak one language... your American.

Dude, that was hard!  Pero ahora yo puedo hablar in Español.  It only took three years and is still a work in process.

As a side note, all the people who told me Spanish was an easy language to learn... they lied to me!
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Offline gi6ers

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #4 on: April 07, 2012, 08:16:50 PM »
Being a dad.

Try Niquitin minis.

Offline DanG

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #5 on: April 07, 2012, 08:52:32 PM »
The birth of my daughter, when after 36 hours the delivery room started to fill with multiple doctors, nurses, midwifes and other specialists when my wife started to bleed out... 

Yeah that was a hard, heart stopping moment.  Really hoping we dont have it again...  Due any minute now actiually (due date was last monday).

Giving up the cigarettes?  As a 40-a-day man when I did, was actually really easy.  I always swore to myself as a single bloke that the moment I met someone that was worth it, I would give up, and then I met my wife (as Inso points out, the willpower route is OK as long as you give a toss about the only person being disappointed in you... is you).  Although my definition of giving up did not include cigars on spoecial occassions.  Which has equated to a total ban as I have no cigars and those bad mothers take a good couple of hours to burn though and I have not had an uninterrupted couple of hours in years (at least in a place that I could smoke a Cigar)


« Last Edit: April 07, 2012, 08:53:38 PM by DanG »
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Offline beefcake

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #6 on: April 07, 2012, 09:25:22 PM »
Telling my Mum her mum had died.

My son having emergency surgery at 6 weeks old and close to death.

Offline by-tor

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #7 on: April 08, 2012, 04:17:56 PM »
WOW after reading through these giving up the fags seems relatively poultry , looks like ive had life easy .
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Offline agentmolar

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #8 on: April 14, 2012, 02:54:19 PM »
The last three years of my life.

1. Having a kid

2 Starting my own business from scratch where it opened 1 week after 1.

Yeah... good times. Thankfully things appear to be stabilising of late, might actually be able to paint or collect minis again.
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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #9 on: April 14, 2012, 07:57:23 PM »
Being buggerd at school from day 1 to the moment I gave up and got a job because I'm interested in Sci-Fi and fantasy.
Tried to be my own boss and gave up after 5 years of working late, ill and for minimum wages.
My son was born 3 months early and had all sorts of stuff wrong with him.
My wife getting in a postnatal depression for a year.
Struggling as the only person who made a living with a depressed loved one and a kid who needed special care.
When all things brightened up, (jobs were cool, kid was healthy, we both made a decent living) my wife died of cancer exactly a day before her 39th birthday.
Being a single, depressed dad at the age of 33.
....
Hardest of all: struggling to find a hard moment now that I'm happily married again, got 2 nice and healty kids and a brighting future. (them Monty Python lads were right at the end of 'The Life of Brian'  :thumbup: )

Offline Thadrin

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #10 on: April 24, 2012, 11:20:08 AM »
I'm never going to complain about my life again.

FWIW I'm sure I've pretty much blanked out the hardest part of my life, which pretty much encompasses my life from age 13 to 18. Bullied at school and my Dad getting ill, going into remission, then getting ill again and passing away not long after I left for University.

Moving to a different country and having the standard trials of parenting (with a bout of paranoid depression that had me seeing a psychologist while my wife was in the third trimester) seem like nothing compared to that and what you lot have been through.
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Offline Ben Brownlie

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #11 on: April 24, 2012, 11:43:43 AM »
Spending an age deciding between Earl Grey and Builder's Bum and then finding out there's no tea in the house and I'm stuck with coffee

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Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #12 on: April 24, 2012, 11:53:56 AM »
No Tea?!

Someone needs to get their ducks in a row bleeping sharpish!

That would be a trial separation if that happened in my house  :twisted:.
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Offline Gangrel

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #13 on: April 24, 2012, 12:23:00 PM »
...Bullied at school ...

... depression ...

A friend of mine always claimed she was going to write a thesis detailing the incidence of bullying and depression among games. She always reckoned that both were several times the national average.
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Offline Inso

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #14 on: April 24, 2012, 12:35:33 PM »
...Bullied at school ...

... depression ...

A friend of mine always claimed she was going to write a thesis detailing the incidence of bullying and depression among games. She always reckoned that both were several times the national average.

I was ginger, heavily freckled, undernourished and hyper-active, with a tendency to have convulsive fits (upto about 7 years old)... I had no idea what a wargame was at the time. Was I bullied?... yes (name-calling mostly... mostly...) was I depressed? Nope because I was able to to take the mickey out of myself ten times better than everyone else so they sort of forgot about it all and got back to British Bulldog, Danger UXB and War!

So... does the bullying/depression come from being a gamer OR do the bullied/depressed TURN to gaming?
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Offline Gangrel

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #15 on: April 24, 2012, 01:27:46 PM »
So... does the bullying/depression come from being a gamer OR do the bullied/depressed TURN to gaming?

I have NO idea! I'm just a humble chemist. My (completely unsupported) view, would be that the imaginative and perhaps more introverted are the sort of people who are more prone to these things,  but also more likely to drift into more imaginitive and 'quieter' hobbies. I certainly wouldn't be looking for cause and effect. My friend drifted into the financial world, so I think she probably gave up on psychological research!
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Offline Thadrin

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #16 on: April 24, 2012, 03:37:03 PM »
In this case I don't think the two were related.
Depression is probably not even the right medical or psychological term for what it was...anxiety is prossibly better. Was convinced that something was going to go horribly wrong with my child. Most likely relate dto the fact that, at the time, I was primarily working with Infant Leukaemia research.

Now, any of my other, probably myriad, psychological problems, there you may have a point.
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Offline Thantos

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #17 on: April 25, 2012, 11:09:32 AM »
Reading through this thread made me realise how much some people can go through in one lifetime, and keep on fighting. Then come out the other end and be a success running a business/ holding down a job, having a family and painting/sculpting great FoD minis!
(Which are the three most important outcomes in life for sure ;))

In the least cheesy way possible, you guys are very inspiring

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #18 on: April 25, 2012, 11:21:34 AM »
Never give up! Never surrender!
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Offline Bergil

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #19 on: April 25, 2012, 01:39:57 PM »
* waves a sword about *

Offline DanG

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #20 on: April 25, 2012, 02:42:59 PM »
Being buggerd at school from day 1 to the moment I gave up and got a job because I'm interested in Sci-Fi and fantasy.

Ah yes the public school system...   :whistle:
 DO you really mean that particular choice of wording, cause if you didn't like it you could have called the police in?
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Offline DanG

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #21 on: April 25, 2012, 02:44:55 PM »
The birth of my daughter, when after 36 hours the delivery room started to fill with multiple doctors, nurses, midwifes and other specialists when my wife started to bleed out... 

Yeah that was a hard, heart stopping moment.  Really hoping we dont have it again...  Due any minute now actiually (due date was last monday).

By the way.  Just so that nobody was left hanging...  We had none of the problems with delivery this time round.  Less than 2 hours from arrival at the maternity unit to birth of my second daughter.  Although they did have to stay in for a couple of days in observation as the baby was not weeing.
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Offline Gangrel

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #22 on: April 27, 2012, 12:54:37 PM »
Glad to hear there were no similar problems this time. Conrats all round.

Best,
Mike
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Offline somaticon

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #23 on: April 27, 2012, 06:48:37 PM »
The hardest thing?
1) looking after my mother dressing her, helping her out of bed and getting her about after braking her spine in a car crash in another country. Both my parents were involved but mum got home first. My mum is very proud and it really upset not being able to do anything herself.
2) surviving a suicide attempt I was in and out of hospital all the time sometimes in intensive care. I felt that I was a burden on my family and tried to end it. I'm glad I failed.
3) going into a sectarian stronghold and creating a three walled childrens mural in an area full of murals glorifying violence. I worked with the local kids to plan what images to use it took three weeks but itwas fun.
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Offline Gangrel

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Re: Whats the hardest thing youve ever done ???
« Reply #24 on: April 27, 2012, 08:19:38 PM »
The hardest thing?
1) looking after my mother dressing her, helping her out of bed and getting her about after braking her spine in a car crash in another country. Both my parents were involved but mum got home first. My mum is very proud and it really upset not being able to do anything herself.
2) surviving a suicide attempt I was in and out of hospital all the time sometimes in intensive care. I felt that I was a burden on my family and tried to end it. I'm glad I failed.
3) going into a sectarian stronghold and creating a three walled childrens mural in an area full of murals glorifying violence. I worked with the local kids to plan what images to use it took three weeks but itwas fun.

All of those are real achievements, but somehow I find number 3 to be  real jaw-dropper. All praise to you.   :applause: 
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